When the Journey must end.

There is an end to everything my friends. Regretfully, with bad 70's(and 80's) music, it has yet to happen. My sister recently attended a Journey concert, much to my chagrin. She even went so far as leaving me a voicemail with them playing "Don't Stop Believin'" and her screaming the words at the top of her lungs. Why do they feel the need to replace all the g's in their song titles with apostrophes? I think it's compensation for what they are lacking(which happens not to be tight pants and unsightly bulges).

Who would have thought a bad jazz-fusion band could aspire to be an equally horrendous pop band to rival Boston and Foreigner? If you're a fan you might be asking yourself: With songs such as "Lovin', Touchin', Squeezin'" how can I be disappointed? 

Well, as evidenced by the following picture, they leave much to be desired. In fact, this picture pleades my case better than any rhetoric I can utter.

These men could only be considered cool in the late 70's-80's.

My point is: If your original lead singer is 10 years past a hip replacement surgery, maybe it's time to call it quits. Calm down hardcore fans, I am aware that Steve Perry wasn't the original singer, but he is very old and has a fake hip.

Fantastic Contraption

I don't care who you are or what you do. If you ain't played Fantastic Contraption, then you ain't shit! It's only the coolest physics game ever...

My only criticism is that they need to write more than one MIDI loop for background music. After several hours of the same 10 seconds I believe I have gone completely insane. No big deal.

Take that Chris Reilly!

My 15 year plan.

Like most other Americans, by the age of 25 I have acquired a sizable amount of debt. My wife and I sat down and figured out a plan to pay it all off in three years, saving the whole while.

That seemed a good idea, but I have been inspired by AIG.

Here's my new plan:

I will spend the next 15 years aqcuiring vast amounts of debt, making sure to spread it throughout the entire economy. I'm talking every market, a little here and a little there. By the time I go bankrupt, I will be "far too important" to let go under and the federal government will bail me out. I'm also going to change my name to either an acronym, or add a Mac after my normal one.

I'm so fucking smart I can't even handle myself.

My big mouth

Hello blogosphere!!

After withholding for a very long time, I have joined you. There was a time that I mocked your residents without end, now I am one of them.

On this blog I will be: Retaliating to Chris Reilly, whining about politics, making fun of anything I feel deserves mocking, and enriching your lives to no end.

Sit back and allow me to blow your mind. I'm awesome.